It’s almost National Ice Cream Month, for which we can thank the late Mr. Reagan.
Apparently he still had some energy left after deregulating air travel, making sure it would never again be comfortable or reliable.
(A quick aside: Yes, I realize Carter should get blamed too. And, yes, I know that the issue is much more complicated and that it was really “partial deregulation.” All you experts who want to argue, just back off. This is humor. I get to make things up. Plus: the late Mr. Reagan was not a thin-skinned type like you.)
From DisplayFakeFoods.com
The folks at Cowabunga Ice Cream are on the case, beating everyone else (even Ben & Jerry) and grabbing the bumper of the ice cream public-relations truck as it pulls out.
The Cowabungians sent The Food Watchdog a press release full of amazing ice cream facts.
There’s the usual, always shocking average intake number: Americans eat 23.2 (yes, twenty-three-point-two) quarts of ice cream, sherbet and the like…a year.
Even if you eat diet frozen treats, that would be impressive: 185 Weight Watchers Giant Latte Ice Cream Bars, for example.
There are other factoids too, direct from the International Ice Cream Association:
Sunday is the big day for ice-cream purchases. (See Matthew 80:2—”And on the seventh day, He finally had a good time.”)
The most popular flavor in America is vanilla. (And we wonder why Europeans look down on us?)
The biggest ice-cream eating cohort is under 12 or over 45. (Well, duh. Either not on or already off the marriage market.)
But the best, most useful fact is this: The average number of licks to eat an ice-cream cone is….drum roll, please…..50.
They had me right until this number. I mean, come on, who can make an ice cream cone last that long? Probably the same people who eat mints, Lifesavers and Tootsie Pops without biting into them.
Anyway, thank you Mr. President. For making July National Ice Cream Month and July 17, 2011, National Ice Cream Day. I will think of you with more kindness the next time I am traveling from Denver to New York by going through Dallas.
–Kimberly Marlowe Hartnett
